In the News #1.1: Megastar Sharon Cuneta supports her husband Sen. Francis “Kiko” Pangilinan in his decision to help Sen. Noynoy Aquino in his Presidential bid. The Megastar refuses to comment on Korina Sanchez’s tirade against Kiko.
Our roving chikadora and now rampadora and now order taker was able to get an exclusive statement on the Korina Sanchez issue when Ate Shawie went to McDonald’s to order a Big Mac Meal. According to our unreliable chikadora, the Megastar walked to a nearby window and said “Ang mga tala- mataas, mahirap maabot. Pero ipinapangako ko, Kiko, bukas, luluhod ang mga tala”. When pressed for more, Ate Shawie said, “Last na ‘ to, ha? Lumalambot na yung fries, eh.” “Korina, noong una hinangaan kita. Pero nang makilala kita, sinabi ko sa sarili ko na hindi lang kita papantayan, lalampasan pa kita!” A standing ovation was given to the Megastar and was given Baguio Oil and Birch Tree after her performance.
In the Same News #1.2: Later in the same McDonald’s restaurant, Mar and Kiko crossed each other’s path. According to our chikadora, the situation was pretty tense. Here is the recorded transcript of the Mar and Kiko conversation:
Kiko: “Ang problema sa’yo, Mar, maaga kang kumandidato”
Mar: ” (Quiet) I was never your partner, I’m just your partymate kaya hindi mo ako sinusuportahan” (attempts to walk out and stops for a moment) ” You made me believe we had a chance”
Kiko: ” I care about my job, sir. I care about you and Noynoy. ”
Mar: “Kung saan, kailan, at paanong labanan, magpasabi ka lang. Lalaban tayooooo!”
In Other Unreliable Press Release:
Presidential aspirants were so impressed with the recently concluded 2009 UAAP Cheer Dance Competition. With this development, the opposition has decided that this will be the best way to settle as to who will be sole opposition candidate for 2010. According to our sources, Noynoy, Erap, Manny, and Bro. Eddie has been scouting trainers from Japan and the NBA. Stay tuned for more pyramid and basket toss action! Bongga!